Update: Need a Halloween costume? I have put all of my ideas collected over the years into an ebook on Amazon.com
2 Bee or not 2 Bee: 430 PUN-tastic Halloween Costume Ideas at Amazon $2.99 
Don’t have a Kindle? No problem. You can download a Kindle app FREE.
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For Halloween, I want my fellow teachers to dress like medical professionals and put a sign on our backs reading, “Staff” Infection. I don’t know why they just look at me like I have a third eye. I think it is funny.
Every since I was in college in the 70’s, I have been the Halloween costume “Go to” person. Sure, people are posting ideas on the internet, but yeah, most of them have come from me….’Tis true.
In college, a friend of mine wanted to go to a Halloween party at a bar, but you had to dress to go. He wanted to look good and wasn’t into wearing a mask. You know you make the face behind the mask, right? You know you do. Anywho, I told him to wear a suit, and put a tape measure around his neck and one of those tomato pincushions on his wrist and go as Elizabeth’s Tailor. I know, creative, right? He got in not really wearing a costume.
Ok, how about if you want to wear a costume, but your spouse/significant other does not. Well, dress as an old man and put a big C on the other one’s chest and go as Old Man and the C.
One year at school I just wore a tiara and a B on my chest and went as The Queen B
Two years ago I wore a white sweatshirt, put on some bunny ears and tail and put one of those plastic dusters around my neck and went as a dust bunny. Last Halloween, I just wasn’t feeling it, so I just got a huge cardboard quarter and put in on my back and went as a Quarterback
If you don’t have much time to make an outfit, cut out pieces of a map and hot glue it to a cap and go as a Head Trip
If you want to look pretty, wear a gown and a tiara, get a box and a rope and go as a Drag Queen
I wanted my daughter to wear a tacky gold outfit, everything gold, and spray paint a kid’s plastic shovel and go as a Gold Digger
Get a witch hat, a lab coat and stethescope and go as a Witch Doctor or a couple could dress like doctors and have a sign on their backs Which Doctor
I dressed my kids as bees and put the letters on their backs 2 Bee or Not 2 Bee
Black Eyed Peas- Blacken your eyes and wear the letter P all over your shirt.
Don’t really want to dress up? Cut out little clock faces and tape them on your hands..Too Much Time on Your Hands
Illegal Alien-My daughter dressed like this when she was younger and was pissed because only the teachers understood what she was. Jailers outfit, green face with alien antennae.
For a guy, Make a cardboard window, with saran wrap as the window pane (or nothing at all), write Tom on the window and he can go as a Peeping Tom
This is too old for many, but I had a friend name Judy in college and I gave her the idea to wear a Christmas garland wrapped around her neck like a boa and she went as Judy Garland. I guess your name wouldn’t have to be Judy. Just put the name Judy, on our chest and the garland.
For a guy who doesn’t want to dress up, just carry an umbrella and go as Rain Man, you know, like the movie, (I just made that one up..’Tis true…)
A group could carry plastic hatchets and knives and put B’s on their chests and go as Killer B’s
Dress like any kind of animal and wear a party hat with it and go as a Party Animal
Couple-Guy could be a Knight, girl could go as the sun- Knight and Day
I guess I could keep writing for a while. Coming up with a Halloween costume is fun and a little creativity goes a long way.
If you need a costume, drop me a line. I am the Self-Proclaimed Queen of Halloween Costume Ideas after all.
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Enjoy this story? Jumping in Mud Puddles is now an ebook. Have a look see. 
My literary debut. Amazon.com for $3.99.
Jumping in Mud Puddles: A Memoir of a Picky, Hyper, Big Fat Liar
Jumping in Mud Puddles 