Turtle Talk

 My dad used to go fishing in Canada a  lot when I was young. One time he brought home a three legged box turtle.  I wrote earlier about having a now illegal tiny green turtle that I named Victor when I was little. So, I always  had a liking  for turtles. And then there was Snappy.

Snappy's asleep at the bottom of the pond

 Snappy wasn’t your usual box turtle. After we built our house, we put in a large pond down in front. It was deep with an artisan spring on one side, running run from an old foundation of a spring house and we built a deck on the other side.  We stocked it with fish and it was a cool pond.

 Well, one day I was stunned when I saw a monster turtle walking through the yard. I went outside and watched it enter the pond. There was no way I was going to tell my husband because he was on 24 hour patrol for muscrats and snapping turtles.  Too bad. If you didn’t want wildlife in your pond, let’s just throw some dirt back into it and call it a day. I loved the sound of the peepers in the spring and the bullfrogs amused me. And now I had my very own snapping turtle.

 My husband finally saw the turtle when she was floating, with her head above water.  I told him that every pond needed a snapping turtle to keep the fish population down. I explained the food chain and tried my best to keep him from getting that stupid gun. It worked. He left Snappy alone.

 Female snapping turtles come out of the water and climb to the highest point nearby to lay their eggs. The first year after we moved out into the country, Adam came running. He found eggs buried in a pile of dirt from our excavation of the house. We collected them. 36. She did this every year. Sometimes the skunks got to the eggs before they hatched. Sometimes I helped her dig her hole when the ground was just too rocky for her.  But, I had an upclose and personal experience with Snappy that I will not forget.

 We have (well, he still has it, I don’t) an inground pool that was built right on the edge of a small rolling hill. There is a very large pond behind our house that I think Snappy would visit every once in a while. As she was walking up the hill and over, she stepped right into our pool. I saw her do it. It was 8:30 in the morning. I was getting ready to go outside to vacuum the pool, and she was just swimming around like she owned the place. I was worried she would start scratching the liner, because I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t

former pool..turtle is gone too

  be able to use the ladder or the steps in the shallow end.

  My husband was working midnight shift and didnt’ get home for another hour or so. So, I yelled for Adam. He stumbled out of bed, looked out his bedroom window and started laughing. I didn’t know how we would get a huge snapping turtle out of the pool. So, I did the most logical thing and got the pool net. Ok, so that was a stupid idea. But, it worked without breaking the pole…at first.  I got a huge rubbermaid box that had Lego’s in it. (Now the Lego’s were homeless, lying all over the carpet.)  Adam held the rubbermaid box on its side and I tried to scoop up Snappy to slide into the box. Well, except that she decided to hang out in the middle of the pool, mocking me. I would run on one side, she would swim to the other.

 She finally came to the surface and I tried to scoop her up with the net. I am surprised it didn’t break. I lifted her as much as I could and slid her into the waiting Rubbermaid box. I was scared that she might lunge and bite Adam.  He then dragged the box down to our pond and tipped it over. Snappy was as happy as a lark. Or a turtle. She immediately went down to the bottom of the pond.

 I was proud of us for getting Snappy out of the pool before she had time to tear the lining of the pool. Which she would have done if she was in the pool for any length of time. But, when we told my husband about our great adventure, he got a bit mad and said, ” Why did you put her in OUR  pond?”  I called him a jerk and walked inside.

And that is why I am divorced today. Ok, not really, but you know. I thought I did good. Saved the lining.

 I bought an expensive purse for my trouble.