I have always known I was adopted. My mom told me numerous times how she met a lady on a street corner in downtown Wheeling, West Virginia, and I was handed over to my dad and her. Right there something doesn’t sound right. I was also told my birth mother was at the Florence Crittenton Home in Wheeling until she gave birth. I don’t have proof of that, however, as all the birth records before 1960 were deliberately burned………….. Say what?
Yes, years ago I called Florence Crittenton and was told by the director that the records were burned. She wouldn’t have been able to give me information anyway, since things were confidential. I just wanted to know if I had a twin for sure. I still would like to know that. So, I have decided in my ripe old age of 57 to find out.
Light years ago, when I was a junior in college, my sister called to tell me she met my twin. Sure, people have people who look like them, but when she told me, “No, I mean, your REAL twin,” I just had to hear the story.
My sister was in a bar and noticed a girl across the room who she said looked exactly like me and had my mannerisms. She approached her with a laugh and told her she looked exactly like her sister and if by the chance was she was adopted? Why, yes she was. She then told my sister her birth date…same day, month, year, AND city of Wheeling. We were on to something.
We decided to meet. Her name was Joyce and although I didn’t think we looked exactly alike, we did look like sisters and found a lot of things in common. From what I remember, we both had kidney problems when we were little, and well, that’s all I remember at this time. She lived right across the river in Steubenville, Ohio. We both brought our birth certificates. Hers had the hospital but not the time of birth,and mine had the time of birth but not the hospital….or something like that. We were sure we were twins. What are the odds that babies would be born on the same day in 1956, from the same city, and hospital, and both were adopted….and we looked alike. Yeah, we just had to be twins…
We were going to get together and get a blood test to see for sure, but we drifted off, never to talk again at all.
I find that weird now, but at the time we were young and I guess didn’t feel the need to form a sisterly bond. I don’t know. And so in 2014, I have no idea where she is or if she is still alive.
I’m going to find out.
It’s funny, but on my real birth certificate, the name of the birth mother giving their child up for adoption is supposed to be completely blacked out. Mine was not. Someone put a simple line through the name: Nancy Jane F*******, age 17. That could have been a made up name for all I know. That would make my birth mother 74 years old if she is still alive…. I’m so good at mathematics. Maybe my birth mother was a math teacher.
My adopted parents were told that my birth mother was from Philadelphia and that her dad was a big time lawyer who brought her to Wheeling all hush hush….and that Nancy played the piano to bide the time….all lies. My birth mother was a local girl. The director at the time told me all the adoptive parents were lied to as to where the birth mother was from. I wish I would have known that before my mom made me take piano lessons. That didn’t last too long as I was as talented as a piece of drift wood.
I was also told my birth name didn’t necessarily come from my birth mother. My name on my birth certificate was Deborah Lee….Debbie. My name was Debbie, but probably named by a nurse….. or a janitor. I had no idea.
I did locate several Nancy Janes…one was from a city near Wheeling. Of course, again, that name could have been a lie too. But, if it is true, that Nancy Jane had another set of twins about 12 years later…so there may be a whole lot of me walking around.
I had no desire to locate my birth mother for a while, as I was sure she was bony and hunched over, had long bleached blonde hair, wore a tube top, carried a pack of cigarettes, and had a smoker’s croupy laugh. Mainly, I didn’t want to upset my mom and dad. Besides, you could open the door to a whole new world of Cousin Eddie’s. On the other hand,if my birth mother drove up in a Mercedes and spoke French and Italian in the same sentence, and had hundred dollar bills falling out of her fur coat, I would sit up and take notice.
My brother hired a detective and delivered 6 Nancy Jane F*******s for me, wrapped in a bow one Christmas. My husband at the time even drove to Ohio to check it out and even talked to the one woman. She denied being that age. As he drove off, he noticed a gigantic jade tree in her picture window. I too, had a gigantic jade tree in my kitchen. So,of course,that had to be my birth mother. We laughed, but not really. I then decided to not pursue it again.
So, back to my twin….
So, the years went by and I still talked about Joyce but still did nothing except for same comment, “One of these days I’m going to try to find my twin.” I don’t know how many times I have said that. I don’t remember what high school she went to, but she may have graduated in 1975 unless she started school early like I did and graduated in 1974.
But, I’m going to find out this time. I really am.
I am going to start with Facebook.
So, Joyce, adopted from Wheeling 11/56, and raised in Steubenville, Ohio…. leave me a note here.
PS…if people are reading this from Facebook, please share on your facebook wall. It’s already getting a lot of hits. Thanks!!!